Be the Parent!

“Your kids don’t need you to be their friend; they need you to be their parent.” 

That quote is from a book by Steve Arterburn and Roger Marsh – “Internet Protect Your Kids.”  Our church is currently going through a sermon series about the dangers facing our homes.  Here are some disturbing facts:

  • a boy sees his first porn at age 11
  • the porn industry in America is a 13 billion dollar business
  • 90% of our teens use the internet, and one-half go online everyday
  • our youth now spend more time on the internet than watching TV
  • over 20% of our youth have internet access in their bedroom (this is probably much higher now due to the advent of iphones which is essentially a computer in their hand)

Just as any responsible parent wouldn’t through their child into a grizzly bear den, responsible parents need to be just as aware of the dangers of the internet and take steps to control it in the home – limit access, parental controls, monitoring, etc.  In other words, be the parent.  Understand the dangers and keep up with technology. 

I have just finished reading another book – “Robert E. Lee on Leadership”, by H.W. Crocker.  Lee was a great general, but he was also a great father.  Here is a quote from a letter of fatherly advice he wrote to his son at West Point:

“You must study to be frank with the world:  frankness is the child of honesty and courage.  Say just what you mean to do on every occasion, and take it for granted that you mean to do right.  If a friend asks for a favour, you should grant it, if reasonable; if not, tell him plainly why you cannot:  You will wrong him and yourself by equivocation of any kind.  Never do a wrong thing to make a friend or keep one; the man who requires you to do so is dearly purchased at a sacrifice.  Deal kindly, but firmly, with all your classmates; you will find it the policy which wears best.  Above all, do not appear to others what you are not.  If you have any fault to find with any one, tell him, not others, of what you complain; there is no more dangerous experiment than that of undertaking to be one thing before a man’s face and another behind his back.  We should live so as to say and do nothing to the injury of any one.  It is no only best as a matter of principle, but it is the path to peace and honour…Duty then, is the sublimest word in our language.  Do your duty in all things…You cannot do more, you should never wish to do less.”

These are bold, caring words of a man who knew how to be a parent.  Parents, your kids need you today more than ever.  Be the parent!

“Living by grace”







About Jim Schnorrenberg

Husband; father; grandfather; minister; counselor
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2 Responses to Be the Parent!

  1. Todd Zemler says:

    Access to porn can be blocked on your wireless home network by signing up with a free service called Once signed up they will give you a url that you type into your wireless router configuration. Most newer routers have this feature (complete setup instructions are sent to you after you sign up). After that, all web traffic will be filtered before allowing access. You can block by category: porn, guns, drugs, gambling, etc. This all happens seemlessly without the user even noticing. You can also view reports and see what sites they have been accessing.

    Unfortunately this only works if your child is connected to your home network. They can still access these sites by using their phone’s built in network…but it will be much slower.

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